Warnings!


Back to Homepage

1. NEVER give out full name, your home telephone number or address on your postings. Use only your first name with people who respond until you feel confident enough to let them know more about you.

2. For your own safety, do not let people know the town/area you live or work in. Stalkers can trace you even by knowing just your name and where you work. If someone was determined to make physical contact with you, they would stop at nothing to find out where you were.

3. Never give out too much of your personal information from the start. Discuss your likes and dislikes and see how much you have in common before you tell people too much. Find out as much as you can about a person, such as their hobbies, favourite foods, books etc. You will get on better with people that share the same interests as yourself.
Once you feel that it is the right time to tell them more, perhaps swap mobile numbers or use public phones to call eachother. Only when you really know a person, should you give them your home telephone number.

4. Never arrange to meet anyone before actually speaking with them. You may be a woman thinking that your penpal is a women, when really it has been a man writing to you. Always speak to your penpal first, and if you do agree to meet, do it ina public place where there will be a lot of people around at the time. You should also take someone else with you and let at least 2 other people know where you are going, who you are meeting, and what time you expect to return. Never accept offers of a lift home from anyone, use either your own transport or public transport. Ensure that you are not followed home, and do not allow anyone to enter your home unless you feel 100% safe with that person. Make it clear to the person on what level your relationship is at, and do not feel under pressure to advance the relationship if you are not ready. Do not lead people on and let them think that your relationship is more serious than it really is. When you are ready to advance the relationship, please ensure that you take adequate precautions to protect against AIDS, sexually transmitted diseases or unwanted pregnancy.

5. You may get contacted by people from less developed countires, who basically seek out penpals in advanced countries, starting off as friends, but then they start asking you to swap gifts with them. They will send a small item and expect something larger and more expensive in return. They will also ask you to help them get a visa to enter your country and to accomodate them. People of both sexes also try to find partners or temporary marriage partners to help them leave their countries. If anyone asks you to marry them soon into a relationship where they are based overseas, it is usually becuase they want to move to your country, not because they love you. Do not be fooled into a relationship that is only going to end in tears.

6. There are people that prey on young women and men, offering them a new life in another country, when all their intentions are just to seduce and use and abuse them. Never be seduced into any type of relationship, or do anything that you're not happy with just to get help from someone.Also, many young people seduce elder people the same way, promising a relationship when all they are doing is trying to see how much they can get out of you.

7. Many men have been caught in a scam whereby they marry a women from overseas and bring her to their country as their wife, and soon afterwards the wife demands that the man also brings her family over as well, or they ask for their husband to support their families back home financially. This leads to many marriage breakdowns, and evn domestic violence, and death. DO NOT GET CAUGHT OUT, GET SMART! 

Thankyou for taking the time to read our warnings. We hope that we have not scared you into seeking freinds, but everything that we have learnt is from experience and research, but we want our members to be protected and happy with the people that they find. Take care and all our best wishes to you all.


Copyright © 2003 - Perfect Penpals International Message Boards